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why is it so hard?

he is by far the hardest one i have to work with.

Sometimes i sit at home
and wonder how it be if he had loved me
truly loved me yes
i learned a while ago that kind of thing it never happens for me
and so i go around and just pretend love is not for me
i play the circus clown around my friends
make them laugh and they won't see
that you never let them see you sweat
dont want them to think the pain runs deep
Lord know its killing me

So i put on my make up
put a smile on my face
and if anyone ask me
everything is ok
i'm laughing cuz no one
knows the joke is on me
cuz i'm dying inside with my pride and a smile on my face...
on my face
singing, la la la,
la la, lalala,
la la, la la, la la, laaaa

Sometimes i sit at home
by the phone
hopin he might call me
but he don't call me
but then i realize
dreams come true
aren't for girls like me,
not like me,
and so i go around with my head up
like it ain't no thing
and when the boys around with all my friends
i'm into other things
cuz you never let them see you sweat
don't want them to think the pain runs deep
ord knows its killing me

Its not easy (thing to do)
sometimes its hard to (face the truth)
its not the life that i would choose
but what else can i do if he don't love me,
if he don't want me,
i'm not about to sit around
let myself go (gooooo)



hug me and dont let go
hold me and don't let go

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February 2013
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