hold me and don't let go (arnogseel) wrote,
hold me and don't let go
arnogseel

  • Mood:

lack of tolerance

the other day someone said how it's rare that my sister and i get along so well (we are 8 yrs apart). i made the usual comment about how i'm a big kid at heart and she's an old soul, so we meet in the middle. but for the first time, i also added that she has a good temper, she never gets mad at me and therefore it makes it easier too, as we never fight.

saying that reminded me that i used to be like that. i used to have so much patience and nothing and no one would or could ever irritate me or upset me... and if it/they did, it wouldnt last long. i had the tolerance. but now that i'm older, i noticed that i dont have the tolerance anymore nor do i have the patience for it.

i wonder if the older you get that you do become jaded or if it's just me and that i have changed for the worse? i blame it on the fact that i encounter a lot of nasty/stupid/mean/etc ppl and i've seen what the human kind can do to each other. and maybe, i just dont want to waste my time with it anymore. i realized that i dont have to deal with everyone that comes my way.

i used to be nice to everyone, always tried to accommodate everyone and even if they were nasty to me, i tried my best to be a good friend to them. now i realized that i dont have to do that, and if they are nasty to me, i give them back the same treatment. i realized that i dont have to deal with everyone. i could walk away. i dont need someone like that in my life. it is just not worth it. they are not worth it.

i wonder in a few years, will my sister be the same?
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